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« David Goldman to testify in Washington | Main | Paternity fraud | "Duped Dads" | What's the answer? »


Michigan Mom

People still assume that Mother's have the advantage in custody issues. I have read that while yes the majority of mother's still retain custody of their children, these are in uncontested custody cases (where the father did not attempt to get custody) but in fact when a father does contest and seeks custody that the father wins 70% of the time. The reality is that the fathers tend to have more financial resources to afford better lawyers, and longer court fights.

There is no stigma attached to a father not having full custody, but there most certainly is when a mother does not. Immediately people question why? Why, what did she do to lose custody? They do not realize the reality that Fathers who fight for custody tend to win.

What about the effects of that Stigma in relation to psychological or medical help for the children? I am in that situation, and it has resulted in 3 years of fighting to get my son a diagnosis. Why? Because professionals assume that the father must be the better parent, and therefore has better knowledge of my son's symptoms. It took me three years, but I finally did get someone to listen, and I did get my sons diagnosis so he can start treatments. But my fight is not over, because he continues to mislead. And every new Dr. who see's my son, I have to anticipate if they will put as much weight on what I have to say, as my ex. And unfortunately it does not always happen.

Joemaflage Familyrights

Here is a little something I sent to our Reps. along with the responce from my own Rep. Valentine who has not signed onto the pending equal parenting legislation. I have many more stats on hand if you would like them just send me a message, but I think these get the point across.
This site has a few ideas to minimize the negative funds of Title IV as well.

>>> 6/4/2009 10:51 AM >>>
I would like to provide you with some information concerning the roots of criminality. I would hope you agree that it is counter productive to hack at the branches of the problem, while leaving the roots intact. The root, in this case, is single parent homes brought about by family court decisions which separate parents from their children in order to extort child support from them. The reason for that is the federal incentive program which pays states for collecting child support, and pays judge for hearing child support cases. We believe that the most effective attack on the roots of criminality would be to implement equal parenting legislation to do away with high conflict divorce, and eliminate the federal programs which make single parent households profitable to the courts yet costly to the taxpayer. (Title IV of the social security act specifically Title IV-D and Title IV-E are the most counter productive sections)

Joe Jurecki
8661 Cook st
Montague MI 49437

37.8% of single mothers are divorced, 41% never married, and only 6.5% widows. Brookings Institute, "Assessing the Impact of Welfare Reform on Single Mothers", Part 2, 3/22/04

"The strongest predictor of whether a person will end up in prison, is that they were raised by a single parent". C.C. Harper and S.S. McLanahan, "Father Absence and Youth Incarceration", Paper presented at the Annual Meeting of the American Sociological Assoc., San Francisco, CA, 1998

In 1996, 70% of inmates in state juvenile detention centers serving long sentences, were raised by single mothers. Wade Horn, "Why There Is No Substitute For Parents", IMPRIMIS 26, NO.6, June, 1997

72% of juvenile murderers, and 60% of rapists came from single mother homes. Chuck Colson, "How Shall We Live?" Tyndale House , 2004, p.323

70% of juvenile delinquents, and 70% of Child murderers, come from single mother homes. Richard E. Redding, "It's Really About Sex", Duke Univ. Journal of Gender Law and Policy, Jan.1, 2008

"After controlling for single motherhood, the difference between black and white crime rates disappeared." Progressive Policy Institute, 1990, quoted by David Blankenhorn, "Fatherless America: Confronting Our Most Urgent Social Problem," New York, Harper Perennial, 1996, p.31

71% of all adolescent chemical/substance abusers, 80% of all prison inmates, came from single mother homes.
Bob Ray Sanders, "Hey Y'all, Let's Fill The Hall (Of Fame), Ft. Worth Star Telegram, Oct.28,2007 Mona Charen, "More Good News Than Bad?", Washington Times, Mar.16, 2001 (citing Bill Bennett, "The Index of Leading Cultural Indicators: American society at the end of the 20th Century., New York, Broadway Books, 1994)

Children brought up in single mother homes are:

9 times more likely to drop out of high school, 10 times more likely to abuse chemical substances,
14 times more likely to commit rape,
20 times more likely to end up in prison, Chuck Eddy, "The Daddy Shady Show", Village Voice, Dec. 31, 2002

"(I)n a recent study by the Baltimore-based Annie E. Casey Foundation. Comparing statistics for its Kids Count report, the organization reported that Detroit ranks No.1 in unmarried births among the nationâ€Ts 50 largest cities. Of the 16,729 babies born in Detroit in 1997, 13,574 were black, 1,679 were white and 817 were Hispanic. Seventy-one percent were born to unmarried mothers. This compared with a state average of 33 percent and a 50-city average of 43 percent."

Detroit is the worst offender on our list of America's most dangerous cities, thanks to a staggering rate of 1,220 violent crimes committed per 100,000 "

In 2003, there were 1.5 Million unwed births, and less than 1% were put up for adoption. Fagan and Fitzgerald (above)

Only 4% of college graduates have illegitimate children, and only 16% of college graduates get divorced, compared to 46% of high school dropouts, who marry in smaller numbers to begin with. Dr. David Popenoe, "The Future Of Marriage In America; "The Frayed Knot - Marriage in America", The Economist, May 26, 2007

50% of single mothers are below the poverty line, their children are 6 times more likely to be in poverty than children with married parents. Chuck Colson, "How Shall We Live", Tyndale House.

The illegitimacy rate went up more than 300% since 1970. House Ways and Means Committee, Nonmarital Births to Adults and Teenagers and Federal Strategies to Reduce Nonmarital Pregnancies, appendix "M", 2003

Subject: Re: The roots of criminality
Date: Wednesday, June 17, 2009, 11:03 AM

Dear Joe,

Thank you writing to me concerning equal parenting and the roots of criminality.

I believe it is important for both parents to be involved in their children's lives.

Again thank you for your concern in this very important matter.

Representative Mary Valentine

Joemaflage Familyrights

I find it interesting that the papers try to turn this into a gender war. The real issue here is negative federal incentive funds. WE fund the courts to produce negative outcomes thru Title IV of the social security act. Most pf the stats I have seen show that mothers get sole custody with minimal visitation for the fathers a little over 80% of the time. In the vast majority of these the fathers have some overnight parenting time around 4 to 6 a month a few have supervised visitation and a few have no visitation or parenting time. When I look at the stats I see a lot of FIT parents who have a minimal amount of parenting time so I asked why would the courts minimize a fit parent? If these parents were unfit I would think they would not have any overnights with the children.
This issue is not a gender war like the article would push but rather an issue of funding. The system is accustomed to giving custody to 1 parent and minimizing the other so that it can collect more money thru higher child support orders and high conflict court actions that lasts till the child ages out of the system. Most of the pawns of the courts are use to the mother being the winner and the father and children the loser in this winner take all setup. At the end of the day the courts do not care which parent gets the kids they will make sure the higher wage earner is stuck with a high child support order which means minimizing time with the children to justify thier own funding. Single parent homes are destructive to our children and society not to mention a high cost to the taxpayer. Equal parenting time as the default between fit, willing, and able parents is the only way to end the destruction of our families.

child custody agreement

I recently came across your blog and have been reading about child custody agreement. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.


This is a great blog and something that we don't see enough of frankly. Not enough visibility is given to this issue and men should know that they have a very good chance of winning custody if they have been involved in their childrens lives and are truly the better parent to fulfill their needs.

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